Cradling the Hose

There's an evolution down here that's probably as old as the fire department itself. It's called cradling the hose, and it's the hardest thing I can think of. It's not easy to explain but I'll try - please bear with me.

Three recruits work together as a team to move 150' of hose charged at 250gpm* from one end of the ground to the other (approx. 150' end to end.) There are three 'doors' which you are required to point your nozzle at and discharge water through. One at each end and one in the middle. Between the doors and the pumper truck which the hose is attached to are a few obstacles. You must lift the hose over these obstacles (pylons) as you move from one door to the other at the whistle. Each man is responsible for a part of the hose and must not let the couplings (where the hose connects) drag on the ground or knock over the pylons. Discharge water through a door, shut off the nozzle, move to cradling positions, cradle to the next door (usually the farthest one away from the one you're at) and discharge water through it. You rotate positions until each recruit has had three minutes at each station (9min.)

It's exhausting. Some how they find a way to make the last hardest thing you had to do seem like it wasn't all that hard after all. They challenge us everyday and we'll be better for it - we'll have to be.

In other news, a few big players from TEEX at College Station came to the academy to notify us that we would be going to Walgreen's tomorrow afternoon to get a meningitis shot. Apparently it's not really up for discussion, it's more like a field trip. If you're in class for more than 300 hours you're required by state law to be vaccinated. Well, at least we get to go out for lunch...

*gallons per minute, as reference a hydrant pushes about 70-80gpm.

PBR & The Other Museum of Natural History

Friday night all the recruits went to the PBR Touring Pro event at the arena. Less than a week before we were watching the Laredo Bucks play hockey on ice which had since been covered with a few hundred tons of dirt. Pretty incredible transformation.

The arena smelled like it looked - a barnyard. Not entirely unpleasant, but certainly distinct. We sat in our section which turned out to be great for hockey but terrible for bull riding. We were nice and close to absolutely nothing. A few at a time, we crept over to some better seats and as the last few sat down were were singled out by the rodeo clown in the pen; 'I came all the way from Kansas and I got here on time...what happened to you?' Hah, we'll we got here on time too - we're just stealin' seats now, sir.

Big beer in hand I watched cowboy after cowboy get tossed from bull after bull. It got a bit monotonous when not one rider could hang on for more than three seconds. Those boys were soon replaced by another more capable group of riders. It got better. By the end there were a few that hung in there for the buzzer. Eight seconds is a hell of a long time to stay on top of a bull. Impressive stuff.

At halftime our Bravo group leader hopped the fence into the ring when the clown requested volunteers from the audience. Complete a series of tasks designed to make you look foolish and you win a pair of boots. Sounds easy enough. Of course it was rigged. Although he won fair and square (not to mention with the most charisma) the boots went to the girl not the big Canadian. Good show anyway Travis.

The following day I decided to take a little drive down San Bernardo to see what authenticities I could find without crossing the border into Narco Laredo. I found some nice hand blown glasses, tin Christmas ornaments, silver trays for everything from fish to eggs, los dios de los muertos figures, gaudy mirrors, giant tin chickens flanking a giant tin Christ on the cross, skids of cow skulls and finally more taxidermy than the ROM. It was a sight to behold. If ever you've wondered where you could buy a stuffed lion, two zebras fighting or the bust of every bovid to ever trot the earth, it's here at Art by God.

I asked the lady who shadowed me through the shop where it all came from. I anticipated a language barrier but she clearly understood what I had said. Her reply was 'the owner gets it.' As if it isn't obvious that each of these animals came from where it came from be it the savanna or the swamp. What silly questions gringos ask.

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjM6eyrQQo_5rSJV5NwhSmOJ24OyBa4z1Sf-TbsXZqXHd1Xwxk_KW44KqYvbytUEusVNA3Uw2jkC5c9XcYalsNJPR9CEGCmdKqLrBdqWiKIDHigBNZ892dIPd8slPd9HGa4RxLfN-BNbSGD/s1600/skulls.jpg

Greased Lightbox

→←+-↻

Loading image

Click anywhere to cancel

Image unavailable

Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset, swiftly go the days

Captain Tyin' Knots

We learned some knots today. Even better, they were rescue knots! I've always been impressed by a man who could tie a good knot. Never being that man I've often thought of learning a few to throw around at the cottage, or camping, or when something seems like it deserves more than just a shoelace double. I love knots.

Today's lesson in knots:
Simple Knot
Square Knot
Simple 8
Figure 8 on a Bight
Double Fisherman's Knot
Bowline Knot

After we were comfortable with our new knots our Captain offered to make it interesting. Two recruits stand in front of the class, the knot is called and the race begins. Last to finish does ten four-count pushups. I tied the figure eight on a bight, and I won. No extra pushups, at least not today.

For me Monday was a day of fear and loathing. Perhaps irrationally, I was anxious about the emergency escape from a second story window. Here's a video example (and note, we didn't do it with a rope or harness.) In the event you need to get yourself out of the window like yesterday; you exit head first, grab the two closest rungs and swing you legs around. Once in a reasonably secure position you slide down with you hands and feet lightly pressed against the outside of the beams - and that's that. I did it, I lived and I tried it again.

Additionally, I was sure I'd be leading the class through our calisthenics routine at the beginning of PT. All the group captains had their shot and logically as president I'd need to man-up for mine sooner or later. Today was the day - the Laredo Fire Recruits chanted 'TEEX, TEEX, TEEX...' for a leader to step forward and I jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire. A few miscounts and forgotten exercises but I did it. I say one, they say fire, I say two, they say fire. It goes on like that until each exercise is repeated 15 times or more unless we're doing four-count pushups, squats or mountain climbers. I'm happy to have it over with but to be honest, it wasn't that bad. We're all here to succeed together. Coming from the often self-centered city of Toronto I have to say I've been surprised by the camaraderie here more than a few times.

After a rather weak showing at the shoulder press station in today's circuit training Captain Perez kindly notified me that hoses are going to kick my ass next week. So it goes.

Rudy's Barbecue

There's some good barbecue down here in Texas, go figure.

Snowsuits in the Desert

We started ground ladders yesterday. The reading is pretty dull but hey, that's just the reading. I never thought I'd get stoked on ladders. C'mon ladders?

We march everywhere. We march in our bunker gear. It was 31ºC yesterday and we were in full gear hauling ladders around the building, putting them up, taking them down and hauling them back around the building. Eventually you get so sweaty that your snowsuit gets nice and moist. Once that happens it's actually not as bad. We hydrate and we do it again.

The leg lock allows you to freely use your hands while 35' up in the air. Rad.

Dark as Night

Our hands on training exercises were conducted in complete darkness. Stress testing. Emotional stability testing. Could we keep it together without the sense of sight?

We had a number of timed trials to see if we could get into our bunker gear with respirator on in two and a half minutes. After we were sufficiently sweaty, we got to try the maze. Captain Perez, our instructor for PT and various other skills, went through this very same maze 14 years ago. It's constructed of wobbly old 2x6s, plywood and drywall. Each of the two section is approximately 20' long. It was painted yellow, but that doesn't matter much in the dark. We were required to follow the lifeline (a thick black rope) from one end to the other in less than 20 minutes. In teams of two we donned the blacked out facepieces and on our hands and knees followed one another through the maze of hanging ropes which simulating downed electrical wires, 24" rafters, attic holes and miniature doors. Lots of squeezing through confined spaces with an air cylinder strapped to you back. No problem. I didn't even run out of air.

In the afternoon we focused on a more difficult challenge: locate a dummy inside a burn building and bring it back out. Again, the masks were blacked out and we had to stay low so we didn't stick our heads in the simulated cloud of superheated gasses. The alleged purpose of this exercise was two fold; first find the victim by crawling through the maze in complete darkness all the while keeping physical contact with your team and using the walls as a guide. Second, you need to successfully complete the mission without taking off your mask (assumed death by asphyxiation) and before you tank runs out (which holds approximately 25min depending on how fast you're breathing.) We all died.

We were separated only briefly after we found our victim. It was enough time for one of the instructors to deem our team leader dead by disorientation. His PASS device went off, and off and off. Through the shrieking of his PASS and the instructors banging things off the metal walls and tables we attempted to communicate. No luck. Were were separated, again. I died. Faced with the insurmountable task of dragging three bodies out of a pitch black shipping container the instructors eventually took pity on the surviving member of our team and ended the scenario.

Later it was communicated to us that the most important skill learned here was never take off your mask. Ever. And we didn't, so I guess it's not all that bad being dead. Lesson learned.

It's getting a hell of a lot more fun around here.

And It Begins

Texas Nugget no.2, Paramilitary training means bootcamp.

Without a doubt this has been the toughest, most physically challenging week of my life. I suppose I kind of read the recruiting instructions and took them as 'if you can run a mile and a half in 10min, 30sec, do a good quantity of pushups and a few pull ups you're good.' In fact, those benchmarks are just to pass the performance standards - to excel in PT (personal training) you need to work until you collapse. We do calisthenics everyday as a unit. It's exhausting and intense but I think it's growing on me. Yesterday we had our first performance standards test. The goal is to work until collapse or two minutes elapse. My grades were: one mile in 7min 11sec (80%), 40 pushups (80%), 48 situps (90%) and 6 pullups (90%.) Although they were good, they were well below many of the others in my class. Most of them achieved over 100% in each requirement. Oh, and I'm the oldest. But I will get stronger, there is no way around it.

Our class is broken into four groups - Alpha, Bravo (I'm in Bravo), Charlie and Delta. Each consists of five or six guys. The fire department hierarchy is based on the military so each group has a captain who gives direction to his team. I was fortunate enough to be 'elected' class president (which is a long story and better recounted in person) which means I disseminate information to the captains. The Captains who teach us our lectures, personal training and eventually skills disseminate information to me. We are a unit.

We are all the same and we are required to look that way. We wear a navy blue recruit t-shirt tucked into navy blue work pants, a black belt, black polished boots and a name tag. After the first day it was impressed upon me that I may not wear a moustache and my hair may not be longer than 1 1/2". This week has been a change of pace to say the least.

Each day I wake up at 6am, shower, shave, make coffee, breakfast and drive out to the academy for 7:30am with my house mates (who are nice guys btw.) We sit for lectures for most of the day, break for lunch at 12:30pm and when we complete each chapter of the IFSTA Essentials of Fire Fighting we have a test. We fill out a Scantron card, receive our grade and discuss the answers. At around 3:30pm we break into our groups and clean the building from top to bottom. We change into our PT gear and hustle outside to be brought to attention in formation and begin our calisthenics. Rinse, repeat.

This is like nothing I have ever done.

Heading southbound through Austin

I had a feeling I'd learn a few thing along the way, sort of cowboy wisdom. Concise kernels of truth about life - or maybe just life in Texas.

Texas Nugget no.1, Habanero Beef Jerky is made with real habaneros.

I guess I just expected habanero to be another way of saying hotter than jalapeño flavouring. Point taken, Texas.

After breakfast in Shreveport we made our way to Waco for lunch - yes that Waco. Except that didn't happen in Waco, it happened near a town named Elk (Lonely Planet: Texas, 3rd ed.) Waco's a fine enough town but for the sole purpose of having some great Texas barbecue I think we came up short. Evan suggested two spots we might try and I guess we chose poorly. Uncle Dan's Barbecue will forever be eclipsed by Cozy Corner's ribs we'd had just days before.

By the time we arrived in Austin it was too late to do much sightseeing so we decided we'd save it for tomorrow and start drinking! We started with a couple of Margaritas at the Iron Cactus and then a couple more. We had chips & guacs for dinner because when you're in it to win it why waste your money on food? Later we wandered over to Opal Divine's which was as much like The Only as we'd come so far on this trip. Lots of great local beers, tasting paddles with four samples for five bucks and our waitress that reminded me an awful lot of my cousin. She handpicked our poison, some of which crept into the 9% range and down the hatch they went.

Day two in Austin was strange - everything was perfectly nice but the black cloud of Katie's imminent departure floated around behind us as if it were tethered. We took a walk along Lady Bird Lake which is actually part of the Colorado River and watched rowing teams glide past. Later we found South Austin on the search for an oddities and collectibles shop. I bought an old pair of carbon steel scissors and a lucky Texas horseshoe (superstitious fingers crossed.) What a great neighborhood! Plenty of great shops, places to eat and even a parking lot full of food trucks. We had fish tacos at Wahoo's - excellent. We later had Tacos al Pastor at Güero's which were kind of bland and slackly prepared.

Nearby is a natural spring-fed swimming pool in Zilker Park. Hipsters and old folks share the cold water with ducks and endangered salamanders. We enjoyed the winter sun on the grass for a while.

Austin has a chain of theatres called The Alamo Drafthouse. This place was like no other I've ever seen. You can drink beer, order burgers and 'quote-along' to your favourite movies. Just so happens they were playing The Big Lebowski that night! The aisles are far enough apart to allow for wait staff to take your order from the long bar in front of you and covertly arrive later with a hot burger and cold beer (and later White Russians of course.) It's not everyday you get the chance to see one of your all-time favourite movies on the big screen with a beer in your cup holder no less.

After a brief but enjoyable respite from the black cloud it was almost time for Katie to go home. We headed off to the airport early in the morning and said goodbye. What a total bummer.

I continued on to San Antonio alone, snapped a Polaroid of The Alamo and finished the journey to Laredo. Now for the challenging part - firefighter training.

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpJhwCpUqH1r7bX3z_Ibg7lqQwYszCYqKREmrUKX5hXqxMRMGNAUFjg5ZSr_-DZPwomBd9vb-phdunbNpdvrZl2ksPrYl_zRkcHASGym5aZrd0QhSI388Dz6K4pnJH7ederOK7vXsnR8JV/s1600/tacos.jpg

Greased Lightbox

→←+-↻

Loading image

Click anywhere to cancel

Image unavailable

Shreveport, LA

We arrived late and put back a few beers with my uncle at his brand new house in Southern Trace. He's got his own golf cart garage - no big deal. The next morning we had chicory coffee to start our proper southern day (or tea - they like their tea too, Evan.) Uncle Pete suggested I wash all that Yankee salt off my filthy car and how could I refuse?

It was nice seeing the southern sect of the Burgess clan as usual, and again as usual the eating was excellent. My often absent cousin Blake even joined us for lunch, a rare occasion indeed. We had none other than a certified Cajun feast at Kim's Seafood. Boiled crawfish, fried oysters, softshell crab and of course Dr. P.

After lunch we waxed my car at a pace that would would make a turtle blush, Banquet beers in hand.

My aunt Robin's parents came over for an epic feast complete with grace to kick it all off. We had filet mignon over charcoal and hickory chips, sausages (or trouble as my uncle endearingly refers to them) and Dijon-caramelized onion salad. Topped off with a few more beers and grandma's Christmas cookies I'd say it was a pretty successful visit. Nothin' like southern hospitality.

The Difference a Day Makes...

In Peace, Love & Barbecue Mike Mills cites Cozy Corner as one of the "shrines, shacks, joints, and right-respectable restaurants." If you love barbecue and you don't own this book, you ought to (the Brothers Laing, that's you...) It's with me now, and it's crossed the border at least thrice not to mention how many times I've take it up north.

So, if we were driving through Memphis around lunchtime, what kind of people would we be if we skipped it? Besides, we missed it last time in Memphis because they're closed on Mondays.

Somehow they make all other barbecue places I've been to look a bit too clean, a bit too inauthentic. The smell alone is enough to make you want to stick around, but wait until the ribs come out of that smoker. It's been a long while, but I think I can safely say they were the best ribs I've ever had. The freshest, tastiest, smokiest ribs ever. (apparently, they only use charcoal!?) That's it.

Later in Shreveport, LA we had Jack's Barbecue (different Jack, same idea.) I can't compare it to Cozy Corner so I won't. It's was ok. The sliced brisket sandwich was tender, the sauce was ok and the ribs had a nice peppery bark.

Nashville, TN

Toronto to Nashville: Google Maps estimate +7hrs.

Hands down, this was the worst day of driving I've ever endured. The day started calmly enough with my car sputtering to a start only to stall four times before we hit the Gardiner. Yes, I should have changed my battery before we left - but why not wait? Cross-border savings!

The the snow squalls which were forecast materialized between London & Sarnia around 5:30am. I was sure this would be the worst of it - we're in Canada, it couldn't be any worse further south. I was wrong.

As the car I'd spared no expense praising over the years became increasingly temperamental we decided to take an early morning tour of Sarnia for an emergency battery replacement. Replaced that myself by the way, as the snow fell around us. +1.5

The border crossing was surprisingly simple, although lengthy. I had my SEVIS paperwork, my receipt for my M-1 or I-95 or whatever it's called and had it quadruple-checked by the curious border patrol officers. I later found out one of my classmates was turned away the day before with his wife and new baby for an issue with his paperwork. Close one, I guess. +1

Picked up my bunker gear from Joel at Turnout. Quilted pants & jacket in Texas - looking forward to it. +0.5

F Burger King.

Around 3:30pm, just as we crossed into Kentucky the weather was quietly appointed the new Tour Director of our little holiday until further notice.

We found ourselves in a traffic jam that extended over 40km of intersecting highways around Fort Mitchell, KY. It took over 2hrs to travel 11km. The highways were completely iced over. I've never seen anything like it. No salt trucks, no police directing traffic, no signs warning of the terrific weather. Not a single radio station reported any of it.

We regrouped at McDonald's and took advantage of the free WiFi. Not to be undone by our deteriorating situation, we set out for a back-roads adventure in Northern Kentucky. I had resigned myself to not eating at Jack's Barbecue in Nashville. +3

Hours later we came across a newly inverted SUV resting against the dynamite wall. I pulled over and Katie ran over to do what heroes do - save some lives. As we arrived on scene the final passenger was squeezing out of the rear window. She couldn't have been more than five years old. All four family members were without a scratch. The father explained to me in strained English that he had been listening to music and closed his eyes. He said something I couldn't understand about Jesus. His wife said they had no insurance. The fire department arrived. Not 100m up the road was another almost identical accident. +0.5

I guess we weren't having such a bad go of it after all.

F Sonic America's Drive Thru. That makes 2/2 burger meals. Combined I'd only give them a 6/10.

Additional traffic jam. +1

Nashville, good night.

Adios, amigos...

Happy New Year.

Tomorrow at 4am Katie and I leave for Nashville, TN our first stop on the way to Laredo, TX. We'll pass through into the great United States of America at Sarnia and make a quick stop in Southfield, MI to pick up my bunker gear at Turnout Rental. This is the beginning of my journey to becoming a firefighter...